get him a new dad pleae
original under the cut:
I also write fanfiction
I hate the trope of "I refuse to hit women!! [Gets decked]" cause it's boring but I do like the trope of someone in an RPG going "hey I don't wanna hit a kid that's kinda fucked up" and the kid just obliterates them
"i refuse to hit a woman!" = Sexist, overdone, does nothing to actually empower the woman or make the guy seem nice
"I refuse to hit a kid" = valid, even funnier when the kid whips absolutely ass in one go
The ONLY exception to this is Mob Psycho where it's a kid vs woman fight, in which the kid doesn't want to hit a woman because he has been told that only scumbags hit women. And then the lady pauses the fight to explain this is a different situation and he's not bad for defending himself.
Then he proceeds to whip ass in one go.
the sun literally sets and casts a golden hue over everything every single day and we fucked it all up and invented paying rent
i will ALWAYS clap my hands excitedly and lean forward in my seat when someone tells a character to "keep your dog on a leash" only for it to turn out they're referring to another person
the way it reframes the entire relationship dynamic between the two people being addressed. the way wilful loyalty becomes hopeless devotion. the way aggression and violence goes from honorable and rational to bestial and instinctual. the ways faith and trust intersect with codependency and reliance. the questions about power and who wields it in the relationship it opens up. the way it functions as both an insult and an expression of intimidation, of fearful submission.
For reals, it doesn't even have to be a whole cat.
...That sounded wrong.
Anyway, I have a neighbor who rescued a frostbitten, bedraggled little kitten with a badly injured leg, he had to have some amputations done at the vet's and though Admiral Nelson has some battle scars, he's the dearest, cuddliest tri-paw'd, one-eyed, half-tailed thing ever, and sure enough, the judges considered him Best in Class for his personality and demeanor. He didn't just get a ribbon, but a little medal and he did so well at the cat show, that's how come my neighbor decided to get him formally certified as a therapy cat. Now he has a little vest, and alternately a sort of navy uniform one with a pinned-up sleeve, and when humans are dealing with orthopedic surgery, amputations, even just being unwell in general at a rehabilitation facility where my neighbor works, they sometimes get to spend time with him and often feel quite a bit better.
There was an awkwardness when a nurse had a tuna salad sandwich at the charge desk, the Admiral decided to leave his sleeping patient and go inquire if a deserving cat might have a quick bite between watches, a different patient spotted him in his naval uniform and was worried her medication was causing hallucinations, but apart from that, the little guy does awfully good work and is a popular fellow.
All cats are best cat. That is science.
a merchant has died trying to do the akira slide in a wagon
HELP, I'M LOSING IT AGAIN, BECAUSE THIS CHAOS GREMLIN CHILD USED TO SNEAK ATTACK BATMAN BY HIDING UNDERNEATH THE BATMOBILE AND HOLDING ON WHILE IT DROVE AROUND AT LIKE 300MPH OR WHATEVER
AND GOT SO GOOD AT IT THAT BATMAN ACCIDENTALLY TOOK HIM ALONG ON A SUPER SECRET JUSTICE LEAGUE MEETING
PLEASE PRAY FOR BRUCE WAYNE HE HAD TO RAISE A DICK GRAYSON WHO DID THIS KIND OF THING JUST FOR FUNSIES
Also he clung to the underside of the Batmobile whilst it was tearing along at high speeds and WHILST HE WAS WEARING A CAPE, of the sort which could so easily have been caught in the axles and that would have been... messy
When I'm in charge of the planet, it will be illegal to make a job posting unless you are actively searching for a candidate.
Lean staffing will also be illegal. If you need three people to do a job, you're hiring four.
You are also either earning an amount or you are not earning that amount. 'Earn up to 21.50/hr' no. Either you're paying 21.50 or you are not paying 21.50. Tell the truth or jail for employer for 1000 years.